The 5 “Best” Excuses I’ve Heard for Not Showing Up to Work

The 5 “Best” Excuses I’ve Heard for Not Showing Up to Work

It’s August and employees everywhere are thinking about how they can take full advantage of the remaining weeks of summer. If they have used up all of their vacation days, taking a day or two off may call for a little extra creativity.

“I’m not feeling well” will suffice for many employees, but of course there are those confident others who push the envelope when it comes to imaginative reasons for not coming into work.

Here are five of the more inventive excuses that I have heard. Business owners and supervisors often wonder if they are true; in many cases it would be very difficult to find out!

1. We’re Trying to Get Pregnant and This Is Supposed to Be A “Fertile” Day

If there was ever a case of TMI (too much information) this one might be it. While some employers may be sympathetic to the complications involved in getting pregnant, it is usually a topic best left for friends and family. It’s easy to ask too many questions when an employee uses this excuse, and I suppose a straightforward “good luck” is the best thing a business owner can say in response. Remember HIPAA rules on excuses like this one!

2. I Have a Flat Tire and I’m Waiting for Someone to Help Change the Tire

If you drive to work, a flat tire is an inconvenient but common occurrence. Many employers can certainly empathize with the employee stuck on the side of the road waiting for help from the garage or AAA. This excuse would hardly raise an eyebrow if this same employee didn’t frequently mention that they don’t have a driver’s license or a car!

3. I Was Out Late and Am Simply Too Hung Over to Get to Work

What an outrageous excuse! I used it myself in my 20s and it was true!! There is little you can say when an employee admits to being too hung over for work. One can assume (with great benefit of the doubt) that they hope you can “relate” or will feel sorry for them. Sure this one seems quite far-fetched, but it can be true. After all, only an employee suffering from a hangover would actually use this as an excuse to stay home.

4. There Was a Huge Microburst Storm in My Area and the Roads are Washed Out

You have to give this employee an A for effort. People who blame the weather must forget how easily one can check the Internet for weather and road conditions. A simple Weather Channel search can help you find out if they are being truthful or trying to be creative while calling out.

5. I Got Robbed In Vegas and I’m Waiting for a Replacement Credit Card to Arrive

This excuse is inventive and is served up by only the most imaginative of employees. Were they actually in Vegas for the weekend? The fact is that the excuse evokes immediate sympathy and the employee is good for a day or two as they get everything in order to return home. Can you somehow verify this excuse? Most certainly, but checking with the LVPD for a police report seems a bit excessive and will certainly be time consuming. There’s nothing to do here but commiserate with their bad luck.

The good news is that most of these excuses, as wild and unlikely as they may seem, can’t easily be used more than once. If the same employee manages to come up with other excuses as equally original, you might wish to evaluate their job description and see if their creativity can be put to better purposes to work on YOUR BEHALF.

August 9, 2017